Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Suspendisse varius enim in eros elementum tristique. Duis cursus, mi quis viverra ornare, eros dolor interdum nulla, ut commodo diam libero vitae erat. Aenean faucibus nibh et justo cursus id rutrum lorem imperdiet. Nunc ut sem vitae risus tristique posuere.
Learn more about the results we get at Within
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Suspendisse varius enim in eros elementum tristique. Duis cursus, mi quis viverra ornare, eros dolor interdum nulla, ut commodo diam libero vitae erat. Aenean faucibus nibh et justo cursus id rutrum lorem imperdiet. Nunc ut sem vitae risus tristique posuere.
Binge eating disorder (BED) is a serious mental health condition that can have devastating impacts, not just on the people struggling with it, but on their friends, family, and loved ones.
Whether you're wondering how to help a friend with binge eating disorder, how to help a partner with binge eating disorder, or how to help anyone else with BED, there are some ideas and considerations to keep in mind.
Despite being the second-most common eating disorder in the United States—behind only the umbrella category of other specified feeding or eating disorders (OSFED)—binge eating disorder is still widely misunderstood.1
The condition revolves around episodes of binge eating, which involve eating large quantities of food over a given period of time (for example, in a three-hour window of time). There is a loss of control during these episodes over what and how much is eaten, and they are often followed by feelings of shame or guilt over the behavior.1
Unlike other eating disorders that feature binge eating episodes, BED does not include compensatory behavior, meaning those who struggle with BED do not exercise, vomit, use laxatives, or participate in other behaviors to "undo" the effects of their binge eating.1
Generally, a doctor or therapist will diagnose binge eating disorder if someone experiences a binge eating episode at least once a week over the course of at least three months.1
Causes of BED
As with most eating disorders, BED can be traced to a number of biological, psychological, and environmental causes. It usually isn’t just one factor but a combination of issues that lead to the development of binge eating disorder.
Some common binge eating disorder risk factors include:2
The experience of trauma—particularly bullying, discrimination, food insecurity, and abuse—has also been tied to the development of BED.3,6
Common misconceptions about BED
Binge eating disorder remains misunderstood, despite impacting a large number of people.
Many believe that the condition is simply an issue of willpower. They may say that someone with BED can simply choose to eat better or stop eating so much. This is not the case. In fact, this widespread misconception about BED is partially what drives feelings of shame, guilt, and embarrassment around the disorder for those struggling with it.
Others think everyone who struggles with BED is overweight, but this is also untrue. The disorder impacts people of all body shapes and sizes, as well as all genders, races, ethnicities, and ages. And BED is neither rare, the same thing as bulimia nervosa, nor a behavior people only resort to when they're stressed.
When to get help for someone with binge eating disorder
Many people with BED will try to hide their symptoms of binge eating or possibly even be in denial of their condition or the severity of it. This can all make it difficult to know whether someone is even struggling with BED, let alone when or if they need help.
Some warning signs to look out for include:2,4
Missing, hidden, stashed, or hoarded food
Evidence of binging episodes, such as food wrappers or containers in the garbage
Obsessive thinking about food or specific food cravings
Often eating alone or avoiding food-related events with others
Frequent dieting
Feelings of guilt, shame, embarrassment, or remorse related to food or eating habits
Weight gain or weight fluctuation
If you recognize some of these warning signs in your loved one or otherwise worry they may be struggling with a deeper binge eating problem, it's likely time to seek out help.
Helping someone with binge eating disorder
Whether you're wondering how to help a friend with binge eating disorder, how to help a partner with binge eating disorder, or how to help a son or daughter stop binge eating, there are approaches you can take that can help encourage both their seeking treatment and their long term recovery.
Remember: Eating disorders are complex, and recovery is a process. If they're an important part of your life, it's important to help someone with binge eating disorder at the many different stages of their recovery journey.
If you think someone may be struggling with BED, the initial step is talking to them about it. But this can be a lot trickier than it sounds.
It's important to foster a non-judgmental atmosphere. People with eating disorders are generally already sensitive about the situation and may feel embarrassed or ashamed of their behavior, making it difficult for them to open up.
Try to remember that the behaviors and thoughts they're experiencing are the result of a mental health disorder and not a choice or the fault of the person going through them.2 Using active listening techniques, such as reflecting and asking open-ended questions, is another good way to show the person you're really hearing them.
Even if you feel you don't have the answers, the most important thing is to approach someone with honesty, empathy, and an open mind. You may not agree with everything they have to say, but showing them you're there for them can make a world of difference.2,5
If someone seems open to discussing the issue, you can start advocating for professional help. Binge eating disorder rarely goes away on its own, and it often takes therapy and other types of care for someone to make a full recovery.
You may want to prepare for this step ahead of time by researching mental health professionals or eating disorder treatment programs in the area. Familiarizing yourself with the symptoms of BED is another good place to start to help you understand the types of risk factors at play and find appropriate care.
You can also do some research on the benefits and effectiveness of therapy for binge eating disorder, especially if you think someone may need a little more information to feel comfortable making that step. Also, don't forget to look into other potential care options, such as medication and support groups.
A large part of therapy for binge eating disorder is learning and establishing new, healthy coping mechanisms for the situations that tend to trigger binge eating. A good way how to help someone with binge eating disorder is to help them practice or reinforce these changes.
Mindful eating practices, self-care, and different stress management approaches are common tools for overcoming BED. You can ask your loved one to discuss these changes with you, what they mean, and what they should look like, and gently remind them of these strategies or offer to practice with them if it seems appropriate.
You can also help them explore different ways to avoid triggering situations like emotional stress and emphasize the importance of self-acceptance and self-compassion.
This is especially important if you're trying to help a partner with binge eating disorder, a child with the condition, or anyone else who lives in the same household.
There are many ways to help create a more supportive environment at home. You can be mindful of avoiding certain topics, such as talking about dieting, weight, or eating behavior. You can help promote mindful, balanced eating practices, including regular meals and snacks, either through verbal encouragement or participating in these changes yourself. Additionally, having an “all foods fit” approach at home can help to de-stigmatize binge foods.
Involving other family and friends in the effort can also help—of course, as long as your loved one is comfortable with sharing this type of information. Eating disorders tend to thrive in isolation, allowing someone to suffer in solidarity and potentially convince themselves that no one else is experiencing what they're going through or could understand what they're thinking or feeling.
You can also address any triggers in your home and work to honor any boundaries that need to be established. Ask your loved one for more information on which changes will be the most helpful for their long-term recovery.
Recovery is not a straight line. Relapses happen, and when they do, it's important not to waste someone's entire recovery effort.
Rather than being hard or harsh on someone if you notice evidence of them binge eating again, try to approach them with empathy, honesty, and openness. Offering reassurance and support during challenging times can signal to the person that they're safe and ease any feelings of guilt, shame, or fear that may accompany the setback. This can make it easier for them to get back on their recovery path.
It's also important not to focus on the setback itself. Identifying what triggered the relapse is important, but try to help the person see how far they've come instead and remind them of the reasons they wanted to get better to begin with. Patience and compassion are often key aspects of dealing with these difficult situations.
Don't forget about your own self-care
Indeed, helping someone else can take a lot of energy away from yourself. This is why it's important to remember your own needs, even when someone else is struggling.
You may want to try following your own mindfulness or meditation practices, journaling, yoga, going for walks, meeting up with friends, or participating in other activities that feel good, help you relax, take your mind off of the situation, and help you feel more grounded and focused.
When your own energy is depleted, it can be even more difficult to give anything to anyone else. Filling your cup first can help ensure that you have enough left to offer your loved one in their times of need.
Disclaimer about "overeating": Within Health hesitatingly uses the word "overeating" because it is the term currently associated with this condition in society, however, we believe it inherently overlooks the various psychological aspects of this condition which are often interconnected with internalized diet culture, and a restrictive mindset about food. For the remainder of this piece, we will therefore be putting "overeating" in quotations to recognize that the diagnosis itself pathologizes behavior that is potentially hardwired and adaptive to a restrictive mindset.
Disclaimer about weight loss drugs: Within does not endorse the use of any weight loss drug or behavior and seeks to provide education on the insidious nature of diet culture. We understand the complex nature of disordered eating and eating disorders and strongly encourage anyone engaging in these behaviors to reach out for help as soon as possible. No statement should be taken as healthcare advice. All healthcare decisions should be made with your individual healthcare provider.
Resources
Binge Eating Disorder. (n.d.) National Eating Disorders Association. Accessed March 2024.
